How do I deal with the guilt of hurting people when I came out?
My mum cried for a week and my brother will not speak to me. I know I did the right thing for me, but the house feels like a funeral. Does the guilt ever stop?
Their grief is theirs to move through, not yours to carry. You did not cause harm — you stopped hiding, and they are reacting to news, not to an injury you inflicted. It feels like a funeral because a version of their assumption about you has ended; that is a loss they are allowed to feel without it becoming your fault.
The guilt fading is not the same as caring less. You are watching people adjust at their own speed, and their pace is not a scorecard on how much you love them. My family took about eighteen months; yours may take less.
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