What does asexual mean?

Short Answer

Asexuality is a sexual orientation where a person experiences little or no sexual attraction to other people. It's not a disorder, a phase, or a result of trauma — it's a valid identity that describes how someone experiences (or doesn't experience) attraction.

What Asexuality Is

Asexual people (often called "aces") don't experience sexual attraction, or experience it only rarely or under specific circumstances. This does not mean:

• They can't fall in love (romantic attraction is separate)
• They can't have relationships (many ace people are in happy partnerships)
• They can't have sex (some ace people have sex for various reasons)
• They are "broken" or "missing something"

The Ace Spectrum

Asexuality exists on a spectrum:

• Asexual: Little or no sexual attraction.
• Demisexual: Only experiences sexual attraction after forming a deep emotional connection.
• Gray-asexual: Experiences sexual attraction rarely, weakly, or only under specific circumstances.

Asexuality vs. Aromanticism

Sexual attraction and romantic attraction are different:

• Asexual: Little or no sexual attraction.
• Aromantic: Little or no romantic attraction.

A person can be both asexual and aromantic, or asexual but romantic, or aromantic but sexual. These are distinct identities.

Common Misconceptions

• "You just haven't met the right person yet" — No. This is like telling a gay person they haven't met the right opposite-gender person.
• "It's just a phase" — For some people, identity evolves, but that doesn't make current identity less real.
• "Asexuals can't love" — Romantic love, emotional intimacy, and deep connection are all separate from sexual attraction.

Resources

• AVEN (Asexual Visibility and Education Network): asexuality.org
• ACE Week: Annual awareness campaign (late October)